12/10/01

Today I woke up in a good mood, the day seemed like it was going to be a good day. Why I believed it would be? I don't know. Even the omens were pointing to bad. This morning was very dark, dreary, and rainy. Mom wasn't here to wake us up and see us off. So, instead we got up earlier than usual and left without breakfast. The day was going to be good anyways because I was going to school (my onl social outlet in life, ) and mom is coming home today. My sister asked me to drop her off in front of the gym this morning because of the rain, I'm gald I obliged because on the way I caught a nice glimpse at my crush.(life would be much better right now if I knew my feelins were requitted) After that, things started to go downhill...I did a mediocre job on the two tests I had and then I had to suffer through Ms. Greene's dictatorship. The pointless busy work she has assigned us is enough to make everyone's day bad. Finally after school I saw my crush again but today I didnt receive any smiles or "special looks"...something else to add to a shitty day. Then I had to report to my dad's office for the first day of my "real" job. When I finally saw mom for the first time since friday morning, all she did was bitch out orders. I endured through two hours of mental moredom and went home. Later that night things turned worse. Recently I was admitted to the University of Florida and my mother can't stand it. she is tired of Dad and Grandad ragging on FSU and now because I'm going to Florida she thinks I've turned on her. She treats me unfairly now and is always making sly remarks. Then she totally blew up. She believes I have chosen to go to Florida for reasons that disgrace me...she keeps alluding to our conversation two summers ago in teh pool. She can't be further off. So now she goes to bed upset, but I go to bed lonely (like every other night) AND upset. Tomorrow is already looking bad.